Do you ever wonder sometimes if God notices how full your cup is? As I ask this question, I already know the answer. As my Grandmother always says, this too will pass because God doesn't give you more than you can handle. But at what point is enough, just enough? There is so much going on in our household right now, I'm starting to think we've gone beyond our cup running over and instead, have flooded.
I'm sure if you keep up with my blog, you've noticed, it's been a few months since my last entry. Trust me folks, it's not from lack of wanting to share. We've been up and down the east coast to visit with family, and most importantly, Chris' mom. We've had family and friends coming to visit us and I'm not so sure it was us they wanted to visit or if it was more Tybee Island Beach. Either way, it has been great having everyone come for a visit.
With all the worries and anxiety we've been feeling the last few months, it's amazing to me how God is still providing miracles every step of the way. But alas, instead of me sitting here and writing about all the worries we are experiencing, I'm going to break each one down with a bible verse. Lately I've found the words that I need in the scriptures. Isn't that where God wants us to look for guidance, assurance, peace, and understanding?
Let's start with the 2 most important topics to me at this moment in time.
Chris' Mom and Lil' Jackson Allen
Lord, by such things people live;
and my spirit finds life in them too.
You restored me to health
and let me live. Isaiah 38:16
Chris' Mom, for those of you who have been praying, is improving daily. A true sign that prayers are being answered and God is listening. I pray daily that God will surround Sue with his healing arms and make her whole once again. While each and every day brings new challenges and hurdles, she is moving forward in leaps and bounds. She's finally eating a little, she's getting her strength back, she's off a lot of the medications she had been on, and is even starting to speak a little. She's an inspiration and is truly an amazing woman. With every update we receive, we see once again that God is blessing us. To think that just a few months ago, we thought we were going to lose Sue and now, she's preparing to head out of ICU. How Great is Our God? We all know that there is still a long road of recovery ahead, but we are excited to see the healing power of our Almighty Father. And I have to say, Chris has handled all of this like a true champion. I'm so proud of him. I know it's been tough to be so far away from his mom while she's hurting. But God knows where Chris needs to be right now and even though we are not close by, God is with Sue. She's never alone, and that is the reassurance Chris is living through each day.
A woman giving birth to a child has pain because her time has come; but when her baby is born she forgets the anguish because of her joy that a child is born into the world. John 16:21
And then there is Lil' Jackson Allen Johnson. The little baby that holds so much hope and love for his parents to be. Jackson (or as Aunt Jen is going to call him, JJ) is due anytime now and it can't come a moment too soon. JJ represents more than he'll ever really be able to comprehend. My brother and sister in law have so much riding on JJ to help to heal them from their loss of Parker a few years ago. It's funny how everyone in the family, my parents, siblings, grandparents, everyone, is sort of holding their breath and saying constant prayers. While we all know that Jackson won't be a replacement, he will be the bond that unites his family and heals the brokeness that Christopher and Krystal have experienced. I know God has a plan and that he is sheltering JJ in the shadow of his hand. It is ultimately Gods timing when JJ will enter into this world but it just can't come soon enough.
That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God. Ecclesiastes 3:13
Why is it that just when you think you've got everything figured out, God throws you a curveball? And then you have to once again reassess your trust and faith in the Lord above. I am trying really hard to the cheerleader and remind both Chris (and myself) that God is in control and that we will always be provided for. And as Chris ALWAYS tells me, we'll ALWAYS be alright. We know it in our heads but some days, we have to remind our hearts. We've been unemployed before, we've struggled and due to this struggling economy, the fear of having to deal with unemployment again is present everyday. I know, we probably have a heightened awareness due to our past but what can you do? Ultimately, you have to give that worry up to God to handle but it's tough to let go. Chris is the provider for this family and he takes that responsibility seriously. He wants the best for both Matthew and I. He wants his family to be happy, healthy, and taken care of but he also knows that he can't do that alone. Not only does he need my support as his spouse, but he needs God's hands involved in his daily work. Not everyday is going to be sunshine and roses but everyday WILL be a blessing from above. God has a path and a plan for our lives and Chris' job. There is a reason we were moved to Savannah. And while the days may be long and full of trials and tribulations, in the end, God will reward us for being faithful servants.
I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth. 3 John 4
I still can't believe that Matthew is a 6th grader. I can still remember his very first day of kindergarten. I watched him step up into the daycare van, buckle his seatbelt and then he looked over at me and just smiled and waved. The sheer excitement on his face. No fear, no worries, just happiness. Me? Well, once he was gone, I went to the bathroom and cried. My baby boy has grown up and is getting bigger every day. I miss how his hand used to fit so well in mine and how he used to be so excited to hold my hand. Today, well, today I'm lucky if I can score a hug. It's not that he doesn't love his Momma, he does and he is most definetly a Momma's Boy but he's becoming a young man. He is growing up and taking on new challenges and responsibilities. He's maturing and it makes me proud to be his mom. Matthew has even begun attending the Blitz ministry at church. Not just on Sunday mornings but on Wednesday nights as well. How refreshing it is to see your son grow in the light of the Lord. Matthew has such a good heart and I'm truly blessed to have been given him as a gift from the Lord. While I am sad to see the little boy leave me and grow up, I'm excited to see what God has planned for Matthew is his life. Jesus loves the little children...
You know, even though we have so much going on in our daily lives, God is still all around us. He provides the sunshine and the rain, the calm and the storm, the light and the dark. If we surrender to him and let him take over, what could possibly happen today that He and I could not handle together?
If you do not stand firm in your faith, you will not stand at all. Isaiah 7:9b
Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation. Isaiah 12:2
One of the best opportunities given to me was to enroll in BSF, Bible Study Fellowship. I've completed my first year (out of 8). I've learned so much in reading the Book of Isaiah and now have just begun my second year, Acts of the Apostles. I've grown so much in my beliefs and spirituality and I can't wait to continue on this journey. It's remarkable how God puts the wheels in motion and once you jump onto the roller coaster, he steers you through the ups and downs of life. He is constantly walking with you and the Holy Spirit is within you. And while this entire blog entry has been about the trials we are enduring as a family, it is also a reminder that God is ultimately in control. What other way is there to live?
Do you not know? Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall, but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles,
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40:28-31
I will not grow weary or stumble and fall for my God is with me. His righthand supports me through all that I do and all that my family does. There is no greater love than His. How truly TRULY blessed I am?
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